Saturday, August 28, 2010
The other day I was looking in an old file and ran across the proposal poem my husband wrote to me back in 1989. It was his rough draft, so things were crossed out and it wasn't his best penmanship (actually, I am laughing that I just wrote that because today he's a doctor and his "best penmanship" is pretty much illegible. I think there was a special class in medical school for that!). It was written on the backside of some stationary from our Alma Mater. To the naked eye, it looks like nothing special, but when I saw it, it took my breath away. Seeing his handwriting with words crossed out and changed here and there transported me to a different place and time.
I was typing a paper in the computer lab my Junior year of college. Kevin came and found me and said he wanted to take me somewhere. Normally I'd welcome the diversion, but this was a paper I'd put off until the very last minute. Ok, so it only took a little coaxing on his part. We drove to Lake Johanna where he first told me he loved me. During the 2 years we dated he had taken me there many times to tell me the same thing. He would say, "Gina Marie, I have something to tell you......... I love you!" . We always sat in the same exact spot. I knew what to expect, or so I thought.
This time he said "Gina Marie, I have something to ask you........... Will you marry me?". He then read me the poem. Later, he gave me a typewritten copy of the poem, but I don't remember ever seeing that initial rough draft.
Now, 19 years later I consider that piece of paper more precious than any gift from a store. It was written by a boy who loved a girl, who on a chilly and windy Wednesday night in November, drove 50 minutes each way to my parents house to ask for their blessing. Then he searched across campus until he found me, so that he could ask me the question that burned in his mind and heart.
I remember the way I felt; loved, wanted, blessed, excited, elated, and oh so lucky!
Thank goodness we didn't know all the trials we would experience! We just knew that we loved each other and wanted to commit to a life together. We were only thinking about the joy we brought to one another.
I am thankful to have had him here with me as we have grown from young adults (or kids) to where we are now (older, but still kids at heart). He still brings me great joy! Last night I laughed harder than I have in a long time while watching him play a Wii dance game with the kids and their friends. My daughter later told him that one of the boys had said they want to be a like him when they're his age. What a nice compliment!
I am aware that love is a choice.
I think my husband said it best in a November 2008 blog post. Lind Family
"Love is a choice...............! Yes, for those who have not had marriage classes or read any books regarding the issue of Love, it is a choice. I chose to love my wife and she chose to love me. We choose to continue loving each other each and every day, with the bonds of that love growing with each passing moment.
I did not "Fall in love". I am very sure on my feet and rarely loose my balance, either physically or emotionally. I could choose to stop loving her, this is how divorce happens usually. I have never stopped choosing to love her, nor will I."
There have been times when we've literally said "I choose to love you today". That's not meant as a slam, like 'You were hard to love today', it's more like 'Today was a hard day but I want you to know I choose to love you today'.
This summer he had my name tatooed over his heart with the bible verse from Ecclesiastes 4:12 (New International Version)
Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
The three strands represent Kevin, Jesus and me. Without that central bond, we wouldn't succeed.
What a neat blessing to have come across the proposal this week. It has reminded me of where we've been and where we are now. I'm thankful for both! I'm also reminded of what a gem of a husband he is and that I need to be more; more patient, more thankful and more honoring. I will continue to chose to love him through good times and bad. Just as he continues to chose to love me!